4th Birthday Party

Today we celebrated Tehilla's 4th birthday. Pictures will be at the bottom.

I really can't promise no tears. I remember those early days too well. When I watched over this little baby, hooked up to machines. Noises and beeps resounded in the room. Alarms went off which sometimes brought nurses running and sometimes stabilized on their own.

She was naked with a bandage over her chest and a diaper on. Nice heating lamps kept her comfortable and a blanket that I had received from Sisters by Heart was by her side at my insistence.

She had blue intense eyes that seemed to be speaking to me and no hair to speak of.

She could destabilize at any moment and be gone forever. I told myself, "She is here for now, but there's no telling what will be in the next moment. Don't dream of the future. Don't hope for tomorrow. Just pray right now."

And everyday she succeeded. Everyday she overcame. Everyday she grew stronger.

She came home and was unstable and fragile for 14 months. She survived. She developed. She achieved. I still told myself, "Don't dream. Don't think about the future. Live in today. Today is good."

She grew, she surpassed, she lived. I started to dream. I started to tell my inner voice to shut up, to let me believe in the future.

She's 4 years old. She can jump and skip and sing and count and drive us all crazy.

Let me tell you about the future, I never allowed myself to dream of. She will go to ballet classes next fall. She will get her ears pierced at age 5 1/2 because she pestered us to give in and not wait until she is 6. She will go to the same elementary school as her siblings and need to be taught to sit still and do her homework. She will be fierce and not allow herself to be bullied, but be kind and befriend the girl sitting by herself. She will scare the crap out of us while she learns to ride her bike and falls repeatedly. The same will happen when she insists on rollerblading with her big sister. She will demand a pet of her own because everyone else in the family has one and we will give in. She will continue to grow and succeed. She will be healthy and strong and perfectly- miraculously- normal.

That is the future that I can dream about.

Integration

We are very blessed with some very incredible aspects of the Israeli education system. Not all of it is perfect. In fact, there are some real challenges, but here is one situation when they get it right.

There is a strong drive for early intervention, in this country. There are systems built to monitor how kids are developing, such as Tipat Chalav (Well Baby Clinic), there are centers designed to help early age development with therapies, Hitpatchut Hayeled (Child Development Center) and then they have school integration programs.

This year, a new program has started where 6 children are selected from every preschool, to receive integrated therapy programs during school hours. It will help kids along that are otherwise lagging behind in occupational therapy, speech therapy and any other development challenge.

Without a blink of an eye, Tehilla's teacher asked for Tehilla to be one of the kids, given her long medical history and of course, without hesitation, I signed the papers.

I just met with Esther, her new integration teacher. She told me, "As soon as I saw Tehilla, I felt there was something special about her. She has such a drive for life and such a big heart."

I responded, "Her thirst for life is directly connected to her- not big heart, but her half a heart." Then I launched into a lengthy medical history.

Her teacher will be helping her push ahead and has also asked permission to do Shiatsu message on her to heal her trauma and help her blood pressure. Power to ya, Esther.

She begins on Sunday. In everything else, Tehilla is doing great and loving life to the fullest.

Shabbat Shalom!

Sukkot

With the sukkah put away and the kids drifting off to sleep, I finally have time to share about how our holiday was. We spent every day creating memories and having the most loving family togetherness moments possible- and y'all know how valuable and meaningful family time is for us. 

This was the first year that we felt Tehilla was stable and strong enough to endure sleeping outdoors in the sukkah with Jerusalem cold nights. We all dragged our mattresses and as many blankets as we owned outside and had the most magical family filled glamping experiences possible. No one was left out- Sammy the puppy and Hunter the cat slept alongside (or sometimes on) us. 

And once again, we were reminded and thankful of the miracles G-d has gifted us. Of the truly blessed existence we have and how amazing it was to see our half hearted warrior princess roughing it in the elements. Her lips weren't even purple! A luxurious (for her) shade of pretty pink!

One evening, our rambunctious 4 year was - ahem- streaking through the sukkah, while I pleaded for some bare minimum clothing. I yelled, "Tehilla! You're turning a bit blue! Get some clothes on!" 

She shrugged her naughty little shoulders and yelled back, "So what! I don't want to! I'm fine!" 

I thought to myself, "You are...you are totally fine...what a miracle..." I still demanded some form of basic decency- miracle or not. 

We enjoyed a Shabbat of the entire extended family and a community BBQ. All 3 kids have spent the past 48 hours fighting a stomach bug, but they are improving. 

I'm sad this holiday has ended. It was an incredible experience and it left us all with some treasured memories. 

Now back to regular routines and the miracles of daily life. 

4!

Today is not just the day that I became a mother with more kids than hands. It's not just the day that our family grew by one more. And it certainly is not a day just like any other.

Today is the day Tehilla was born. 4 years ago. It's the day that we all learnt what we were truly capable of. It's the day that changed everything in more ways than can be listed.

Most importantly it's the day we really truly understood how precious every single day is. That every day is the biggest gift and can't be wasted. It's when life stopped being mundane and became truly magical.

Tehilla, you taught me to believe in miracles. You brought the sparkle in to our life and haven't stopped throwing glitter everywhere- whether metaphorically or literally.

My sweet baby girl, you are 4. We are so blessed to be able to celebrate this day.

Tehilla has been walking over to anyone who will listen to tell them about her Frozen themed birthday party that we will be having after the holidays. She falls asleep at night, listing the food I should prepare, the decorations that need to be hung up and the people that need to be invited.

Happy birthday, Tehilla!