Tuesday, March 20, 2018

Part 2: How to explain

Part 2:

I thought I had parenting and life figured out before I had kids. I knew all the ways I was not going to parent and saw all the flaws in what everyone else was doing. My kids would never do that and would surely be everything I set out for them. Someone give me a time machine to slap some sense into my naive former self.

This post isn't just about giving an explanation for my lack of posting. It's not about updating the world and letting everyone into my personal life. This post, I hope, will do something. I hope this post gives validation to those that have been down a similar path. I hope this post opens minds and educates. I hope this helps in some way to change the world. I need it to change the world.

I'll start by saying that Tzviel does NOT have pediatric diabetes. Again, he doesn't. But what if I told you he did. What if I told you that around the time Tehilla was born, we started seeing something irregular. What if I told you that we spoke with our family doctor, who directed us medically. What if I explained that we started treating him and doing everything we could. What if I told you that as much as we tried helping and treating him, his condition worsened and we had to keep providing him with treatment. And at some point medication became necessary. How would you react?

You would nod your head in understanding and mention some friend of a friend who also had a kid with pediatric diabetes. You'd listen sympathetically to the challenges we faced and the changes we all had to undergo in our family to accommodate and assist our child. You'd have been supportive and wonderful.

Would you have suggested if we were stricter and better parents, then he never would have developed pediatric diabetes? Would you have called our judgement into question for providing him with medication? Would you have pushed for him to be removed from other kids, fearing he somehow effect the other children?

I'd like to tell you our heart story from a different perspective. Tzviel's perspective.


  1. Being stricter would not be the answer. Sometime our bodies just don't cooperate. When it involves the glands in the body it has nothing to do with what you are not doing.

    He is a child and should be allowed with other children and just be a child.

    We just love them as they are.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

  2. No one has parenting figured out -- and we all think we're experts BEFORE we have children. All we can do is our best, and I have no doubt that you and your husband always do that.

  3. you still haven't quite explained enough yet... I think you were judging yourself harder than others even would.

  4. wishing you and your family lots of good health always....and like others have said, compassion for yourself....