Dr. Erez came by and he explained that she was doing well and making good progress with her breathing, but the next step was a plan to get her eating. They are giving her nutrients and calcium introveniously. They want me to sit and work with her on learning to suck her pacifier. Once she can do that, they will try to move her to a bottle and then eventually to nurse.
I asked him when I would be allowed to hold her and he said, "Right now."
They set me up in a chair and gave her to me to hold. I cried. I cried for her perfect little face and her special heart. I cried for Dr. Big Nose who had tried to convince us that she would never make it. I cried for the choice we made and the chance at life that we gave her.
Then I tried to get her to take her pacifier. I sang to her, a song I used to sing my other kids when I would feed them. Finally, the nurse came and put some sugar water on the pacifier. Well, that got the little candy junkie sucking! So, thank G-d, we'll keep at it and hopefully make more progress.
I'm crying too!
ReplyDeleteYou got me crying again! So happy to see you holding her!
ReplyDeleteI am so happy that you have finally been able to hold her, I am crying. Love mommy Taub
ReplyDeleteFreakn allergies sniffle, ok ok a few man tears.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this.
I daven for her every morning in my am tefillos. May she have a complete refuah shleima and may she be raised to torah, mitzvos, and Chupah!
ReplyDeleteI cried as I read this. I cried again when I reread it. I continue to cry and pray for your beautiful baby girl. Shoshana you are amazing and so strong! I pray for your family and your beautiful baby girl everyday!
ReplyDeleteYou don't know me, but I feel like I really know you and its all because we have been blessed with children with special hearts.
ReplyDeleteMy son, Zeke, was born with Heterotaxy syndrome that required him to have the Norwood Procedure 3 step surgeries. And after reading this post it brought tears to my eyes as I remembered my first time holding my son and attempting to nurse him. Before that, while he was in the NICU I would leave him and go home to return and visit the next day, and although I stayed most of the day I would leave. However all that changed when I fed him. It was the night after he was extubated and the doctor gave the go ahead for the baby to attempt an oral feed. I asked if I could try to breastfeed. When I got the yes the nurse helped me get him into my arms with all the IVs, oxygen, and wires he was still attached to. I remember looking into his big eyes as he looked up at me for the first time and in that moment we BONDED, and sitting all alone with him in my arms, while he attempted to breastfeed, I started to cry.
There is such a power to the mommy-baby feeding bond. Before that we were mother and baby but in that moment we became Mommy and Zeke and no one could get me to leave his side after that. I wouldn't leave his side, I couldn't leave his side.
I wish you many more of these amazing moments with your miracle baby!!
Ah. The beauty of sugar water. Has gotten us through many Echos
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